Many seniors, because they have lived a long and very experienced life and have seen it all, believe they have all the answers. They avoid the age factor and feel like they are wild teenagers again, and drink and smoke and party like there is no tomorrow — and maybe to some there isn’t, because the body can take only so much neglect. Other seniors dive into the teenage dream with exercise by playing games like golf and bowling, maybe hiking the woods or city streets or even the Stairmaster in exercise room, or ski or romp through hilly forests on an ATV. Of course there are the negative aspects of this healthy version of an old teenager – that is, sore muscles and maybe a bang-up or two. But those are just temporary setbacks.
Then there is the financial side of retired seniors. Most have put aside a bundle of money in the bank or credit union for retirement. Some leave the job and start spending it: A new vehicle, maybe an RV for traveling around the country; maybe plane and ship tickets to everywhere in the world, trying to fulfill that bucket list; toys and more toys to make the idle days more satisfying; and of course now they can afford partying more. One day they look at the amount left and realize that they are healthy and will soon outlive their savings and are almost broke – just like a teenager, again. Frugality and planning are the key words here. “Your net worth to the world is usually determined by what remains after your bad habits are subtracted from your good ones,” said the wise Benjamin Franklin.
“Old friends” is another enigma for seniors. What is an old friend – one who has been around for a long time, or one you knew a long time ago but lost track of? The gang you hang with is easier to deal with -- when one of them is sad or happy you usually know why. If he/she drinks too much you know what to do and when; if one has a health problem, you are there to help; and in reverse, if you have a health problem they are there to help you. “Friends... they cherish one another’s hopes. They are kind to one another's dreams,” said Henry David Thoreau, and that is very true about the close-at-hand gang.
But what about that guy or gal you knew many years ago and were as close as close can be? You were probably as two people sharing one body. Doing everything together, and then time separated you into two different people and time between you became a larger gap. Marriage, school, military commitment, or just plain old wanderlust separated your two egos into different paths. Oh, maybe a letter or e-mail here or there now and then that kept you in touch, but that was about it. Then a reunion party is planned and you have to think about it. She/he is living in a house with a large family on a hill overlooking the ocean, while you are living in a senior community on limited income; the two bodies just don’t fit together anymore and a reunion would be more uncomfortable than fun – you have to pass and not make that mistake.
Mistakes, errors in judgment, to misunderstand the meaning or intention of retirement, are a common dilemma for most seniors and it must be handled on a daily basis, problem to problem. The answers are as unique as the individuals confronting them. “A mistake is simply another way of doing things,” said Katharine Graham, and that doesn’t sound so bad, just your way of doing things. To make a mistake is only an error in judgment. It is the highest form of self-respect to admit your errors and mistakes and make amends for them, as an experienced senior would do, and move on. You have done it before.
Patrick M. Kennedy does full-service editing and writing and has published several books. http://www.abetterword.com/ and http://www.funwithretirement.com/