I once liked surprises. You know the kind I mean, the never knowing what's around the corner type surprises that made childhood and young adulthood exciting. Well, that ship, as they say, has long since sailed. It seems the only surprises that come my way these days are special delivery from Mother Nature herself.
A very dear friend of mine recently received one of these Mother Nature inspired surprises and, as a "heads up," I feel compelled to share his story with all of you.
The gentlemen in question had been experiencing a great deal of pain in his feet. He decided, therefore, that the best thing to do was to give away his cache of well-worn shoes to Goodwill and purchase some new ones. Reluctantly, he did just that. But wait, there’s more. After several days, the practically new, gently worn shoes hurt his feet in the exact same places the old ones had. He tried to return them, but alas, the department store refused to refund his money. Score another win for the neighborhood Goodwill bin, a worthy cause, to be sure.
Desperate to ease the pain in his aching appendages, my friend decided it was high time to visit a specialty store for people with problem feet. When asked by the saleswomen to step on a foot-measuring device, said friend declined and stated emphatically, "I have worn a size 10 since high school and I still do." The woman politely insisted, for clearly she had heard these same words from hesitant customers before. The man, eager to prove the nice, but misinformed, person wrong, agreed to remove his shoes and socks and be measured. To his great surprise both feet measured size 12! With an increase of a size and a half, it's no wonder every pair of shoes, old and new, were torture for his feet.
It has been said that if you choose to listen you can learn something new every day. My friend received an earful of useful, albeit depressing information, that afternoon. Not only do our feet grow as we age, the helpful salesperson informed him, but so do our noses and ears. Who knew? I thought I only had wrinkles, crinkles, and sunspots to worry about, but I was wrong. I wondered what other diabolical tricks Mother Nature has up her sleeve. I decided to check out the facts for myself, starting with the bad news about feet.
In a special to the Los Angeles Times, writer Mary Beckman reported the following "ONE thing that doesn't shrink when people get older are feet: They enlarge. More specifically, they flatten.
"The feet's tendons and ligaments lose some of their elasticity and don't hold the bones and joints together as tidily. When combined with other aging-related changes, the feet can encounter limits to how much use or abuse they can take."
"The most obvious age-related change, however, can be overlooked by many people. A 2006 study looked at the footwear choices of 440 patients at a U.S. veterans' affairs hospital most of whom were men, averaging about 67 years and found that only 25% of them were wearing the right size shoe. "
The article went on to quote Dr. Mark Caselli, an adjunct professor at the New York college of Podiatric Medicine in New York City who said, "Over the years, people tend to remember their Social Security number and their shoe size, but they're remembering their shoe size from when they were 25 years old."
So there you have the facts about feet. I'll save the less than attractive details about aging ears and noses for another time. Suffice it to say, I will be paying more attention to my own extremities going forward.
Writing this story reminded me that I have a big garbage bag in my basement filled with shoes that date back more years than I care to remember. Why, you ask, have I held on to these relics from the past? Answer: I took the advice of an elderly aunt-by-marriage way back in 1965. She advised me to save shoes I really loved because in 40 years or so they would come back in style. Surprise! What she forgot to tell me was that I would probably not be able to squeeze my dainty size 9's into any of them. Although these old favorites are most likely destined for the Goodwill bin in the very near future, at least I'll have the satisfaction of knowing why.