It's sad but true that the relationship most grandparents have with their grandchildren can be defined by one word: money.
Grandparents are the people who are seen but not heard. Their children and grandkids visit them on special holidays, and the only time a child's face brightens at the mention of a grandparent is when their parent tells how much the child received for a birthday or other occasion.
My younger brother and I are very close, but it irks me when he tells me about how he gives in to all of the demands to his grandkids who are in their late teens. He rarely turns them down. In fact, he is so generous to their requests that I refer to him as his grandchildren's ATM.
He responds by saying, “What do you do when your grandkids ask you for money?”
Good question. It depends on what the cash is for. If it's a school item or something to wear, I will probably grant the request. But if it is for a game, a party dress or something that is not absolutely necessary, I will probably turn them down and propose something else – an adventure.
The adventure with a grandparent can take many different forms. It could be a visit to the zoo, the library or a fishing pond in your area. It may be an afternoon or an evening at Barnes & Noble. Or it might just be to take them to the local Dairy Queen for dessert or a restaurant for a special lunch.
Children love mystery or adventure. Josie is 12 and her brother, Harrison, recently celebrated his 11th birthday. When they were younger, I thrilled them with ghost stories. They literally could not wait for the stories to begin.
We would go into their bedroom. I would pull the shades on the windows and turn out all the lights, then I would get into a part of the room where they couldn't find me, change my voice, and tell them a ghost story.
I started out telling ghost stories to my daughter, Rossana, and my son, Dale, when they were young and they quickly adapted a passion for the scary tales.
One evening Rossana invited a classmate to spend the night with her in a slumber party. Becky was a year older than Rossana and her parents were divorced. She was amused by the idea of someone telling ghost stories, although it was evident it had never happened to her.
That night after turning off the lights, I crept to the foot of the bed on Becky's side and began pulling gently at the sheets while talking in a low ominous voice. Becky screamed. She literally levitated from the bed. When she left the next morning, she thanked me for the ghost stories and said, “When can we do it again?" I saw her recently. She is a young woman in her 20s and she still appreciates the night I managed to terrify her.
While money is important to children, it isn't the only important thing. Every town or city has a list of interesting or historical places where you can visit. Go to the local Chamber of Commerce or business district and find out where those spots are located. Then plan some adventures with your own grandchildren. The positive results may amaze you.
Geno Lawrenzi, Jr. is an international journalist, magazine author, ghostwriter and poker player who lives in Phoenix, Arizona. His email address for your comments and story ideas is This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .