Without releasing the fruits of one season, you cannot blossom into the next.
William Bridges

I really do believe in the message of this quote -- and the fruits that often need to be released as we get older include an excess of accumulated and "been there, done that" belongings. But in the past few weeks I've read several stories about the pain that can be involved with this process, and this made me stop and pause for reflection.

I admit that I too often take this issue lightly. Primarily because I helped so many clients with downsizing their excess "stuff" during the decade, plus that I provided senior move assistance through my Living Transitions business. I've also gone through this "release" exercise repeatedly with my own belongings with only positive results. But reading a book called Smart Thinking by Art Markman gave me a new perspective on this process, one that I could relate to fully. The line in the book that caught my attention was this: You cannot replace something with nothing.

This made me think of how I'd been able to successfully change some bad habits, and rid myself of things I needed to release in my own life. Reading this simple sentence also felt like finding the missing piece to the puzzle of how to better support those who find this process difficult, or even impossible. I realized that it's not enough to just tell people to LET GO. It's also important to help people think of ways to replace what they're releasing with something better.

So what are some possible substitutes that may help you make this change in your own life? Here are four suggestions that I believe can be valuable replacements for your excess belongings. I hope this list of ideas will kick start your thinking in this new direction, and help you set a positive course for your focus and energy in the coming months and years.

1. Collect experiences instead of things. What about shifting your focus to accumulating more experiences and storing more good memories? Unlike physical belongings, the things you experience in life will only increase in value over time and can truly be savored later. And an experience can be anything you want it to be. For example, you could try something new like Wii Bowling, playing card games, or the Silver Sneakers group at your Y. You could visit a museum, spend some special time with your grandchildren, take a day trip or week-long vacation, attend a musical performance, join a theatre group, take a painting class, or get out for a walk in nature. Seeking out new experiences is not only fun, it can take up as much time as shopping or dusting all that excess stuff in your home, and produce far more beneficial results.
2. Expand your knowledge base. John Maxwell said it best: "If you live to learn, then you will really learn to live." Shifting your focus to learning will not only add to your knowledge base and expand your thinking; it'll require your time, your energy, and your focus. Best of all, it will help immediately with getting your mind off what you're releasing -- and onto what you're gaining. Other great things about growing your knowledge base? You'll forever have an endless supply of new things to learn. Plus, no matter how much knowledge you gain, it will always be weightless and easy to carry with you anywhere you go -- AND it won't require any physical storage space in your home!
3. Expand your connections. What's another good replacement for your excess "stuff" and belongings? New connections and new friends! You don't have to be a natural social butterfly to accomplish this. All it will take is some deliberate action on your part. A good place to start? Get out and meet a neighbor or two you don't know, or start up a conversation with a few people you see repeatedly in your normal daily life -- at your church, at the senior center, at your fitness club. From this starting point, you can choose which connections to foster, and expand out from there.
4. Live to give. "It's not what you gather but what you scatter that tells what kind of life you have lived." (Source unknown.) So what about releasing your excess stuff and shifting your focus from gathering more things -- to scattering all that you have to GIVE to the world around you? This might mean volunteering your time for a cause you believe in, or for an organization you belong to or support. What about keeping an eye out for someone around you who needs a helping hand or a listening ear? Or think about taking something from the toolbox of talents, abilities, and knowledge you've accumulated over the course of your lifetime -- and look for ways you can put these things to good use in your neighborhood, at your church, or somewhere else in your community. I promise that you won't have to look far, and you'll very likely reap as much (or more) from what you have to give.

Sue Ronnenkamp is the creator and founder of Age-Full Living, an aging education and consulting firm that focuses on the positive aspects, opportunities, and gifts of growing older. For more information, visit Sue's website at www.AgeFullLiving.com.

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